The Utter Bliss and Danger of Ignorance.
So I've been looking around for Al-Quran translations in English ever since I got here. I'm studying the Old Testament like how I never did with the Al-Quran and that made me feel somehow guilty. I know I can just hit order button on Amazon.. but something kept putting me off. So today after class as I was walking home on this extremely sunny afternoon, I saw a booth with some Arabic words signage which is supposed to mean Free Literature = Free Books! I was just testing my luck to see if I can finally get the translation I wanted, but no. The table is full of info about the Jesus Christ.
Come to think of it, it is kinda silly for me to be too surprise that Christianity is being described and translated in Arabic. It is Allah's religion too. And Arabic is the universal language in the mediteranean world, or so I think. I'm not sure if this is what everyone feels, but I always feel happy and at ease when somebody wishes Salam. It is quite unusual for some people to speak Arabic here, so once they do it means that they actually meant it. The guy behind the counter knew spot on that I am a muslim by looking at me reading through the Jawi words and so... we talked about Jesus.
He asked me what I knew about Jesus. I told him I know that he is a prophet, and that he will return to our world when the end of the days arrive to lead the good ones to a safer place. He seems impressed (or maybe it's more to a relief) and then he asked again if I know about Jesus in a more personal way according to the Al-Quran. I didn't know what he meant by the question so I just replied that I've forgotten most parts of the Al-Quran, since I left it for a considerably long time. Hell, I didn't even understand what I read from the Al-Quran. I only know what I know now from what other people had been telling me or in other words, from the second source. I don't understand Arabic except Assalamualaikum, Bismilllah and the Al-Fatihah. It stumped me on how little I know when I should know more. And he mentioned that. He asked me aren't I ashamed to be call a muslim, when I can't even get my facts straight? I am ashamed. Extremely.
He (or George) then continued by talking about how special Jesus is in the Al-Quran but not many seems to see it before. Well I didn't. He mentioned that Jesus is being described in Al-Quran multiple of times when the story is suppose to be about Muhammad. He somehow implied that Jesus is very special. I didn't know what to think. I guess I know that Jesus is special but it didn't stick to my mind. I believe that Muhammad is the last messenger, and Jesus is His prophet too. I guess what's his trying to do is to make Jesus a valid figure, and to show that there is some truth in Christianity. I'm so frustrated as I'm writing this cause I can't even describe the tension that I had when we were discussing this. But he was polite and somewhat fatherly. He told me I seemed different from everyone else and that I should start study and understand the Al-Quran, because or else what will I say to Allah when He asked? We then changed topic about my course and study and what I want to do in life and so on. I initially thought that he would say something like a sufi would do; drop my studies and college, invest on the afterlife and learn the Al-Quran, pray to Allah and do nothing else. But instead he told me to learn and learn and learn anything that I'm passionate about and give me some good money to survive on, but never stop learning religion. He discouraged me from learning religion in college, which is actually what I am and intending to continue to do, because according to him it'll give me the wrong ideas about what is religion all about.
I have a whole story to tell about Tanakh, or the Torah as some people would be more familiar with, and about the my class view about the book. It's absolutely confusing for me, and some are really against what I've always hold on too. I have to write a paper about the Tanakh so when I'm done with it I'll probably comment about it here, if I'm rajin enough that is.
Didn't seem too much ey? Nothing that I can't handle. But afterwards, he asked my permission to let his wife pray for me. And I let them and afterwards I've never felt more touched my entire life. His wife prayed in Arabic, and he translated it for me. It was an extremely long prayer, and I guess what touched me the most is that it's not scripted like all the prayers that we had to memorize. You know, doa makan, doa baca tido, doa masuk kereta, doa mula majlis. It seems so genuine and it came from her own heart.
She prayed to Allah, and thank Him for compelling me to come to their table and talk to them. She thank him for giving me the patience and attention when talking to them. She prayed that I'll aways be protected from the outside and internal danger, from dangerous people and dangerous thoughts. She prayed that I'll keep on looking and talking and asking to Allah, and she prayed that Allah will listen, like He always do. She prayed that Allah will open my heart. She prayed that I'll always be warm by not only by the Sun, but from the Light of guidance from Allah. She prayed that I'll be one of His lights too, to guide other people else where. She prayed that I'll always have joy and peace, with the Light always guiding and following me. She prayed that I'll never feel alone when I'm alone, and to be continued under his blessings.
It was actually far more poetic than that, but that's basically what she meant.
George asked my name and what does it mean. I told him it's The Special One and he exclaimed that it's a beautiful name and praised my father for thinking of such word to name me. He told me it suits me because they can see that I am special. I was at the brim of tears. After a longgg week, to have a complete stranger saying that you're special after having a single conversation together is definitely something. He took a picture of me with his wife and told me that he'll always remember me and keep me in his prayers.
He gave me the translated New Testament and a movie about The Life of Jesus Christ. As much as I'm compelled to open and understand it, I feel terribly scared and afraid. And I'm confused. All I know is that I shouldn't ignore this but this is actually beyond my comfort zone. I wish I have somebody with me in this same situation so that I would be less scared and can help me understand. I would wish that I'm a 6 year old and die with innocence and the bliss of not knowing anything but that would be not facing reality, and i'll be a coward. But I am a coward. :(
Come to think of it, it is kinda silly for me to be too surprise that Christianity is being described and translated in Arabic. It is Allah's religion too. And Arabic is the universal language in the mediteranean world, or so I think. I'm not sure if this is what everyone feels, but I always feel happy and at ease when somebody wishes Salam. It is quite unusual for some people to speak Arabic here, so once they do it means that they actually meant it. The guy behind the counter knew spot on that I am a muslim by looking at me reading through the Jawi words and so... we talked about Jesus.
He asked me what I knew about Jesus. I told him I know that he is a prophet, and that he will return to our world when the end of the days arrive to lead the good ones to a safer place. He seems impressed (or maybe it's more to a relief) and then he asked again if I know about Jesus in a more personal way according to the Al-Quran. I didn't know what he meant by the question so I just replied that I've forgotten most parts of the Al-Quran, since I left it for a considerably long time. Hell, I didn't even understand what I read from the Al-Quran. I only know what I know now from what other people had been telling me or in other words, from the second source. I don't understand Arabic except Assalamualaikum, Bismilllah and the Al-Fatihah. It stumped me on how little I know when I should know more. And he mentioned that. He asked me aren't I ashamed to be call a muslim, when I can't even get my facts straight? I am ashamed. Extremely.
He (or George) then continued by talking about how special Jesus is in the Al-Quran but not many seems to see it before. Well I didn't. He mentioned that Jesus is being described in Al-Quran multiple of times when the story is suppose to be about Muhammad. He somehow implied that Jesus is very special. I didn't know what to think. I guess I know that Jesus is special but it didn't stick to my mind. I believe that Muhammad is the last messenger, and Jesus is His prophet too. I guess what's his trying to do is to make Jesus a valid figure, and to show that there is some truth in Christianity. I'm so frustrated as I'm writing this cause I can't even describe the tension that I had when we were discussing this. But he was polite and somewhat fatherly. He told me I seemed different from everyone else and that I should start study and understand the Al-Quran, because or else what will I say to Allah when He asked? We then changed topic about my course and study and what I want to do in life and so on. I initially thought that he would say something like a sufi would do; drop my studies and college, invest on the afterlife and learn the Al-Quran, pray to Allah and do nothing else. But instead he told me to learn and learn and learn anything that I'm passionate about and give me some good money to survive on, but never stop learning religion. He discouraged me from learning religion in college, which is actually what I am and intending to continue to do, because according to him it'll give me the wrong ideas about what is religion all about.
I have a whole story to tell about Tanakh, or the Torah as some people would be more familiar with, and about the my class view about the book. It's absolutely confusing for me, and some are really against what I've always hold on too. I have to write a paper about the Tanakh so when I'm done with it I'll probably comment about it here, if I'm rajin enough that is.
Didn't seem too much ey? Nothing that I can't handle. But afterwards, he asked my permission to let his wife pray for me. And I let them and afterwards I've never felt more touched my entire life. His wife prayed in Arabic, and he translated it for me. It was an extremely long prayer, and I guess what touched me the most is that it's not scripted like all the prayers that we had to memorize. You know, doa makan, doa baca tido, doa masuk kereta, doa mula majlis. It seems so genuine and it came from her own heart.
She prayed to Allah, and thank Him for compelling me to come to their table and talk to them. She thank him for giving me the patience and attention when talking to them. She prayed that I'll aways be protected from the outside and internal danger, from dangerous people and dangerous thoughts. She prayed that I'll keep on looking and talking and asking to Allah, and she prayed that Allah will listen, like He always do. She prayed that Allah will open my heart. She prayed that I'll always be warm by not only by the Sun, but from the Light of guidance from Allah. She prayed that I'll be one of His lights too, to guide other people else where. She prayed that I'll always have joy and peace, with the Light always guiding and following me. She prayed that I'll never feel alone when I'm alone, and to be continued under his blessings.
It was actually far more poetic than that, but that's basically what she meant.
George asked my name and what does it mean. I told him it's The Special One and he exclaimed that it's a beautiful name and praised my father for thinking of such word to name me. He told me it suits me because they can see that I am special. I was at the brim of tears. After a longgg week, to have a complete stranger saying that you're special after having a single conversation together is definitely something. He took a picture of me with his wife and told me that he'll always remember me and keep me in his prayers.
He gave me the translated New Testament and a movie about The Life of Jesus Christ. As much as I'm compelled to open and understand it, I feel terribly scared and afraid. And I'm confused. All I know is that I shouldn't ignore this but this is actually beyond my comfort zone. I wish I have somebody with me in this same situation so that I would be less scared and can help me understand. I would wish that I'm a 6 year old and die with innocence and the bliss of not knowing anything but that would be not facing reality, and i'll be a coward. But I am a coward. :(
Don't be afraid to find the truth. A million people could try and convince you otherwise, but if your faith is set, there's nothing they can do to alter it.
ReplyDeleteHave faith in the strength of your faith.